Confessions of a TV-holic, Part 1

Okay, so sue me. I’ve given in to the devil that is television.

tv devil

When I left for Europe in December, I’d cancelled cable, my home phone, and internet services. Upon my premature return in February, I decided to stay uncabled, unphoned, disinternetted in an effort to motivate myself to get a job, go out of the house more, and stay off the friggin’ couch.

And it worked…for awhile. I tried to stay on Ireland time, so I went to bed really early (when you cannot watch tv, there’s really no reason to stay up!) and got up early. But as soon as I started meetings friends for drinks and things, I started staying up later and soon I was back on American time which, for me, means staying up ’til all hours and sleeping in ’til all hours–it does not make for successful days.

I told myself that I would not get cable until I got a job; after all, my son had “stolen” our tv anyway and has it up at college…if I got a job, I’d buy a new tv, call Comcast and be back on the couch where I truly love to be. It would be a reward.

tvAnd I’m not the only one who feels this way about the devil television, the time-thief of many well-intentioned humans who are, after all, only human.

Look at these two:

tv2Please. At least I can go outside without the box. And how about Fido here: even non-humans can’t resist!

dog tv

When I was in Ireland, I started watching The Voice, Ireland, which featured the very yummy Bressie:

2010-01-01 009

I can honestly say that I miss Bressie and can’t stand not knowing what happened. As for the rest of Irish television, I cannot say the same.

They have some weird shows over there. For instance, there’s a show called One Born Every Minute. Suckers? Nope. Babies. Live Births  in Prime Time. ‘Nuff said.

I did not tune into Ireland’s Worst Weather, though I’m sure they had a lot of footage for that one. Nor did I check out The Food Inspectors: “Tonight, one woman reveals how she suffered a serious case of salmonella poisoning, and an animal lover discovers how much bacteria is lurking in her kitchen.”

On that particular evening, I watched an old episode of Glee. Can you blame me? As a matter of fact, most of our “favorite” shows are shown over there, only a few weeks later. It beats having to settle for Snooker: The Masters; Operation Transformation (a very popular show about–what else–fatties); Bomb Girls (women blamed for accidental explosions);  or The Undatables, no explanation needed.

No wonder I stayed up until 3 a.m. to stream live shows from back home…on ustvnow.com. I had to. I just had to.

Now though, having lived for nearly two WHOLE months without tv, I die a little every time someone mentions Smash! or Idol or The Voice on Facebook. I am missing whole seasons of shows I’ve watched faithfully for years and I just can’t take it anymore. I shamefully admit that I cannot live without Shameless and so, tonight, I singed up with Comcast and tomorrow a nice man will come and hook me up and as soon as he leaves, I will go straight to ON DEMAND and start catching up.

What have Ted and Barney been up to? I don’t know, but I’m gonna find out. Who’s still on Survivor? I’m dying. How are the new judges on The Voice; I’ve missed Adam Levine so much. And Blake. sigh.

4-TheVoice_s4_300x250_post

Californication. Smash. Shameless. Once Upon a Time. Raising Hope. Modern Family. Parenting…the list goes on. How I’ve missed you all. I can honestly say that I’m dying to see you again and though it will probably be on my computer (unless my dear son brings my tv back), it will not be any less a tearful hello.

I don’t know what this will do to my “job search,” but I don’t care.

My name is Patti and I am a TV-holic. Now bring me some munchies and hand me the remote.

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